That Bible really makes you look hot

Walking down the sidewalk next to church today, I noticed out of the corner of my eye a car slow down and roll down its window. Ready to give directions, I stopped and turned, only to be greeted by three guys leaning out the window leering at me. “Hey baby, can I go [...]

Why Bug doesn’t get a say in the naming of our next child

I’m changing a particularly heinous diaper and Bug is chattering away about a small stuffed elephant that he has resurrected from his often neglected stuffed animal pile.
“Mama, look at this baby elephant, he’s so cute!”
“He is cute buddy, I like that elephant.”
“He’s a girl, Mama.”
“Oh, well you should call it a she then. She’s [...]

Why it’s ok that Bug’s favorite song has the F-word in it

First of all, because it’s an Indigo Girls song. And they’re pretty much awesome.
And second of all, because it’s a cinch to edit out any swear words by yelling “EARMUFFS” really loud. Thank you Vince Vaughn in Old School.

No, really, you shouldn’t have

In addition to getting gifts from families at the PMO, I am also receiving gifts from the other women who work there, women that I spend a considerable amount of time with each week and consider good friends. The evolution of this gift giving was a convoluted, twisted process that I don’t totally understand, [...]

I promise I do more than just watch TV

Last night I watched White Christmas for the first time. I probably had seen various scenes of it before, but I remembered very little about what the plot actually was. And now, I think I’m good. I watched it, I can reference it, I have the requisite cultural knowledge of it, but [...]

Oh no she didn’t

A haiku is cheap
I know, but Saturday posts
are hard.  Suck it up.

Dirty little confession

I read this website.
And it makes me laugh. A lot.
I really should not be allowed to be someone’s mom.

But please, carry on as usual if it’s brown

Atlanta is currently in the worst drought in 170 years, and with our water and sewer bill this month came a sheet of helpful indoor and outdoor water conservation tips. One such tip said:
“Each toilet flush uses approximately 1.6 to 7.5 gallons of water. Do not flush the toilet unnecessarily and consider not flushing [...]

Frickin’ snug fit? Pick and chug it?

The Bug is too sick to go school today, but not sick enough to ease up on his unending questions and general hilarity. Since he’s missing out on his usual opportunity for fine learning, I decided to impart my own wisdom with a little bit of home schooling:
“Bug, what rhymes with trees?”
“Trees and…..yeaves rhyme!”
“Well, [...]

Silly porny

Tonight before dinner, the Bug was occupying himself while I cooked by trying to copy the Sunday comics with his orange Silly Putty. Alas, color print doesn’t come off on Silly Putty the way good old fashioned black and white does, so I helped him out by flipping to the next page of the [...]